


Untitled

by astudyincastiel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Crazy Castiel, Gen, M/M, No Purgatory, Post Season 7, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-07
Updated: 2015-03-07
Packaged: 2018-03-16 16:27:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3495113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/astudyincastiel/pseuds/astudyincastiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The boys get a house and work at living in it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Untitled

**Author's Note:**

> Just some random thing I spit out two years ago when I first got into Supernatural.
> 
> Does it make sense? Not sure. Will it ever continue? No idea.
> 
> Generally, I don't like much of what I write, but I kind of like the flow of...whatever this is. So. I guess there's that?

The house is small, the pale blue paint on the siding peeling off, and the yard looks as if it hasn't been touched in a decade, but it’s bigger than a motel room, bigger than the inside of the Impala, or Bobby’s guest room, and Castiel can see, like he sees so many other things he’d missed before, the struggle that his boys are having as they stand on the sidewalk. Dean might have remembered what it was like to have a home, but that was long enough ago that it may as well have never happened, and Sam’s place had always been in the back seat or a low rent room, except for those few years he’d gone to college, lived in a dorm, an apartment, places he tried not to think about anymore. This place, though, this place is theirs, even if it’s in the middle of nowhere and needs serious work, and he wonders how long it will take the shock to wear off, for them to finally accept that they can finally say “I’m going home” and really mean it.

xXxXx

It takes Sam three days from that moment on the sidewalk, and after five, Dean is still calling it ‘the house’ and pulling faces at his brother when he corrects him. Castiel listens to them bicker about the plumbing in the kitchen, tries not to think about how much he misses his own brothers, and painstakingly cleans the windows in the sitting room until he notices a small party of ants making their way along the sill outside; he stops to watch.

Ants can lift 20 times their own body weight and have a lifespan between 45 and 60 days. An ant has 250,000 brain cells; a colony of ants has, collectively, the same size brain as an adult Human. There are at least 12,000 known species of ant, the smallest being _Carebara atoma_ , 1mm in length, and the largest coming from the genus _Dorylus_ , or Army ants. Some ants can swim, survive for 24 hours underwater, and even those without wings can, when free-falling, glide themselves to safety. The ant’s worst enemy is—

Dean shakes him out of his reverie, trying, Castiel notes, not to look concerned, and says they’re (Yeah, man, you and me; who’d you think?) going to get burgers, and leaving Sam alone with the kitchen sink, since he’s so sure that he and Google have it covered. He stands, smooths out his coat, and follows Dean outside; he pauses on the porch, looking at the ants again without the glass barrier between them, and murmurs a goodbye as he hears the Impala start up.

If Dean looks at him a little funny for the first four red lights, he doesn’t notice, and the concern is gone once Castiel guilts him into getting Sam dinner, too, instead of buying half a dozen tiny pies.

xXxXx

By the time they get back, Sam has made a parts list (Because you took the car, asshole.) and moved on to other things, checking the water pressure in the upstairs bathroom and making sure all the lights work, and Castiel thinks maybe he ought to have done those things before setting up the wireless, but that’s never been the way the two of them had worked; comfort always a last minute complaint.

They sit at a dingy looking kitchen table, and Cas stares at the wood grain because Dean doesn't like it when Castiel watches him eat, insists, that since he’s been doing it his whole life, he doesn't need supervision. He tries to determine how old the tree that made the table had been despite not being able to actually see the rings when a cheeseburger slides into his line of vision (You asked for it, remember?), and he doesn't quite remember asking for it, but he does remember the squirrel he’d seen at the drive through, so he nods, picks it up, and starts to eat. It certainly isn't something he needs to do, or is familiar with, but the burger tastes good, he likes it, and some part of him realizes that this needless indulgence sets Dean at ease, that it reminds him of a better Castiel than he thinks he can be at the moment, and that’s reason enough, isn't it?

xXxXx

Even after nearly a week, sleeping arrangements are still a battle. There’s two distinct bedrooms, but only one worn down mattress, and the game, as far as Castiel has been able to determine, is to shift the mattress between then rooms several times a day when the other one isn't looking, and by 10pm, whoever’s got it, well, has got it. Tonight it’s Dean, as Sam missed his last chance to capture the mattress while he doggedly worked on the kitchen sink, and Dean’s so smug with the little victory that the whole house is full of it; Castiel wonders if he stuck out his tongue if he could taste it, and what it might taste like, but they’re all together on the floor in the sitting room watching a bad monster movie on Sam’s laptop so he’s a little afraid to try.

The movie’s only just passed the midpoint and Sam’s already yawning, but Castiel has only asked half a dozen questions the whole time and it feels like a small victory; he can think of so many, but he keeps them to himself so Dean doesn't get upset, doesn't lose his good mood, even though the film is less enjoyable when you aren't sure what’s going on. When Sam begs off to go to bed, Castiel thinks Dean might, too, just to make sure his little brother doesn't pull a fast one and swipe the mattress, but instead he just shifts closer as they listen to bad dialog and Sam climbing the stairs, presses their shoulders together, and starts to answer all Castiel’s unasked questions (You get it now, Cas? Cool.).

Dean closes the laptop once the credits roll, stands and stretches, and announces it’s bedtime as he saunters towards the stairs; Castiel pushes himself up, straightens his coat, and stands in the dark watching him. At the foot of the stairs, Dean glances back, and Castiel thinks that maybe Dean is going to ask him to come along, to not leave, but he just says goodnight instead, after a few long, silent moments, and the angel responds in kind before disappearing, only the faint sounds of ruffling feathers lingering in the space where he’d been.

xXxXx

On those occasions when Castiel does leave the Winchesters behind, whatever the reason (yelling, fighting, please go away and stop watching me sleep, Cas), he tries to avoid places that he knows; places where his brothers and sisters fell, places where he’d disappointed Sam and Dean, places where he’d disappointed himself. He doesn't like to think about the things that brought him to where he is now, the existence that he leads, the punishment that he faces, though he knows he should, but when he tries his mind balks at the suggestion and supplies something less traumatic instead. If he knew, and despite the vastness of his mind, despite all that he knows, he doesn't know this, that such a thing wasn't exactly healthy, he might be more proactive in fixing it, but he doesn't, so he won’t.

This time he ends up in the African savanna, with no real idea of why, and after the first ten minutes of confusion he decides it doesn't matter because there are giraffes, and what, he wonders, was his father thinking when he’d created those.

A giraffe’s tongue is black and 18 inches long at adulthood, and they typically eat 75lbs of acacia leaves per day, and though that is where most of their water comes from, they will drink up to 10gal of water per day as well. Although rarely heard, giraffes do make sounds to communicate with each other. The knobs on their heads are called _Ossicones_. Their heart is 2ft long and weighs 25lbs; their blood pressure is the highest of any known mammal, up to 280/180mm Hg, and the heart beats 170 times per minute. A giraffe’s neck is actually too short to reach the ground, hence their awkward spread-leg posture when drinking. They are the tallest…

xXxXx

When Castiel returns to the boys, Sam greets him with a concerned expression and Dean yells at him (What the **_fuck_ ** , Cas?!) and he tries to think about what he might have done, but it’s difficult with Dean glaring at him, so he stops trying and murmurs an apology instead, wants to disappear again, but knows, for once, that won’t help.

It takes several more minutes of shouting (Dean shouting at Cas, Sam shouting at Dean, and Dean shouting back at him) before everything is clear; it’s been four days since they’d all sat around the laptop together and Cas hadn't come back, hadn't answered Dean’s prayers, hadn't picked up a phone (We were worried, Cas. and You can’t just fucking do that, disappear like that, on me, okay?). Castiel thinks back, tries to remember if he’d heard anything, if he’d noticed the passage of time, but all he can recall are giraffes and he feels terrible; he apologizes again, staring at the floor, mumbles that he hadn't realized, and nods solemnly when he’s told to pay more attention next time.

The boys leave him standing there, go back to whatever they’d been doing before he showed up, and eventually Castiel forces himself to move, goes outside to sit on the steps, and tries to come to terms with things before he gets distracted again. It’s a bit of a mystery to him, really, why they were so upset, why Dean was so upset, that he’d been gone when all he’s ever done since the day he pulled Dean from Hell is hurt them and bring them trouble. It doesn't make any sense, at least as far as he can see, but Castiel is glad of it, really, if he’s going to be completely honest, because if Sam and Dean didn't want him around anymore, he isn't sure what he’d do, or where he’d go, and maybe that sort of loneliness is what he deserves, but it’s not what he’s getting, and in the end, he decides, maybe his Father wasn't such a bad guy after all.


End file.
